This time I got quite different type of book to myself to read. Marshall B. Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication - A Language of Life was really interesting book about communication. It is one of those books that hopefully changes the way I communicate with others.
Basics of nonviolent communication is observing clearly, understanding the feeling, recognizing the needs and making clear request. I explained it myself even more simply, try to, without judgment, understand what other is saying and why, then make sure you are understood as well. As easy and basics it might sound, I believe no one can always communicate that clearly and honestly.
The book explains with lots of good examples from quite normal and really extraordinary situations how communication can be the key to progress in many situations. M.B Rosenberg has seen really difficult situations, but seems to have handled those well with nonviolent communication methods.
Understanding these methods is not hard. On the other hand learning to use these in everyday communication can take years or decades. We are so learned to use judgments on our communication that communicating with open heart and mind can be difficult. We are so built to seek for acceptance, that we can't understand the true needs behind the things we say and do.
This book is easy to read, but it requires courage to digest. It requires a journey to one's inner feelings and needs. As much of I would like to recommend this to anyone, I feel that to get the benefits of this, one needs to be open enough for the softer values of live. If you've read 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and liked it, this might be a good book for you.
I hope that I would learn to communicate with rules of nonviolent communication in the future. I'm especially keen on trying to use these methods with my daughters. As a parent it is so easy to use authority and judgment to get through wishes. I do know that it requires more than one book to understand and start using this methodology effectively. I added other books of nonviolent communication to my reading list to come to the subject later on also. Now it's the time to start practicing.
Written by +Henri Hämäläinen